THe Harting Family

THe Harting Family

Monday, August 30, 2010

Calling On My Favorite Blogs...

OK so you know who you are..I do not need to name names! So our Battalion is gearing up for yet another deployment and I have been asked personally to chip in with some Family Readiness stuff and of course I am all in. It will be nice to help out and give me something to do while I figure out what my new life direction is going to be...actually this will be part of it. I want to take some of the energy I used to direct toward my sons needs and re-direct to our battalions family readiness. I have already met our Family Readiness Officer, she is a fellow Marine spouse and I think we are on the same page and want to move in the same direction with how exactly we envision getting our ladies ready and motivated up and through our upcoming deployment, I know I said ladies, it's an Infantry Battalion so we have no male spouses.
So we were thinking about our Newsletter. I proposed to work on a portion of the newsletter that would point wives in the direction of the blogosphere and social networking sites that will offer up "positive" help in dealing with deployment and other things milspouse friendly. I would also like to highlight our spouses own blogs with a "blog roll" and highlight maybe one spouse blog entry a newsletter or maybe more than one if we have a lot of wives blogging. What I would also like to do is from time to time introduce the wives to some of your blogs, of course I would never do that without asking your permission in advance but I read some great stuff and I want to share.
I think a lot of times some of the newsletters I have seen are really out of touch with what is going on with the military spouse, and social networking in general. I want to highlight the positive aspect of this because I know there are a lot of blogs out there that are less than supportive. A lot of our spouses will be dealing with their very first combat deployment, as most of you know it never gets easier but the first one is hard, not having any idea what to expect. I think I have a great bunch of blog friends and I think you could all help so much.
So wish me luck with my new project...and I look forward to introducing the ladies from our battalion to some of you!

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Terminal Lance and Knife Hand

I will from time to time post the comic strip off of Terminal Lance. First I clear it with the hubs because he has a clearer perspective than I do in some of his strips...this kid gets it right 90% of the time, the other 10% I say he lacks the big picture..but here is a good one..

Friday, August 27, 2010

Milspouse Friday Fill In #10


1. What secret indulgence do you act on while your spouse is away? (from Devil Dog Darling)  Hmm..not sure if it is an indulgence but I go on nutrisystem.  Ya, I know it isn't indulgent in taste but it's expensive and when hubs is gone I can do it without it breaking our bank and since this time it will just be me it will be even cheaper.  It's a great way for me to get back to eating right and the food isn't horrible, and it really makes me feel better.  I am a "happy" eater, and when hubs is gone I am not too worried about eating all the time.When he is home..It's a food fest, we love to eat out and go out on dates and we just enjoy life.  When he is gone I just use that time to get back in shape.  I have actually started to do that regardless because it's not healthy living the way I have the last 8 years.  I have always exercised and taken care of myself that way but not always have I made the right food choices.

2. If you were a spice, what would you be? (from New Girl On Post)  I would say vanilla, the only reason for that is because I LOVE all things vanilla, candles, perfumes and ice cream.

3. Where do you go for support when your significant other is deployed? (from Texas Meets Washington)
I have a few best friends that I rely on tons is  a military spouse and one works for the State Department.  We have been through thick and thin with one another and we are always there for one another.  I also have a few great twitter friends that I know I can count on no matter what.  Our last deployment was tough and without those ladies and a gentleman...I don't know what I would have done.  It was also sharing homecomings with the ladies as each one of our spouses returned home.

4. What is the oldest thing you own? (from A Troop's Girl) I have an initial ring my mother gave me when I was 11 years old.  I still wear it every day.  And I have only had to have it resized once!  It is literally a part of my body; I don't know what I would do without it.  It's rose gold and it's just a very sentimental piece of jewelry that I love.


5. How did you vision your future pre-military? (from Daddy's Duty) Well growing up around the military my whole life I had a pretty good idea what life would be like.  I didn't know I would get to travel the world too.*thank you MSG Duty* and really who would have predicted 9/11 and our lives changing in a way we could never have planned for.  As Marines you deploy during peace time as well, and that is hard but there is no comparison as to when your loved one deploys to war.  So even though we had been through the separations I never thought it would be so my hubs would go fight in a war. My mother had such reservations about us girls marrying Marines, since she was a young war widow.  But she passed before 9/11 so she had no idea that we would know what it felt like. 




Official Midshipmen

Well yesterday we went to see our son get sworn in as a Midshipmen in the Arizona State University N.R.O.T.C. Program. It was amazing and we couldn't have been more proud. This is something my son has been talking about since he was in middle school, it was a single minded goal that he worked hard for every day of the last 5 years. Yesterday we watched him take the oath, and officially start his long journey to becoming a Commissioned Officer in the United States Marine Corps. It was definitely a very emotional day for all of us but it was all good.

Capt. Borland reciting the Oath.

Our son in the maroon, pretty obvious he is the Marine Option in this picture (lol)

Swearing his Oath.

Michael's suite mates in order, Patrick, Michael, Doug and Jimmy. They skipped class to come to support Michael, I was very moved by it and I am sure it meant the world to Michael. By the way, what a good looking group of young men!

The Marine on the left was one of my hubs MSG's in Africa, he watched Michael grow into the young man he is now. We were thrilled he could attend and this is him, Michael and Greg, I don't think I have ever seen my hubs so proud.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Dear Blog, I am Sorry

Dear Blog,
I am so sorry for not spending more time with you lately. I have just been so busy with all the new changes in my life. I promise you I am not seeing any other blogs. Well ok, maybe that isn't completely honest, I have been reading others blogs, I know I am sorry....please forgive me. But I have needed to put some space between us for a little bit so I could come back to you a better "me". I am coming around, soon I promise. I won't be long...thanks for being patient.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Mil Spouse Friday Fill In

1. If you could be a fugitive from the law for whatever reason, what would your crime be? (from It’s a Hooah Life)
Hmm…I wouldn’t want to be a fugitive, that would mean leaving my family, hate to be a party pooper but there isn’t one thing in the world worth that.

2. How long do you think you will be a military family? (from Julie the Army Wife)
We will always be a military family, Once a Marine, Always a Marine. I am a Marine Brat, Marine Wife and soon to be a Marine mom so I guess I am in it for the long haul..hubs has 5 years before he can even retire and I don’t think he will do only 20.

3. What’s your favorite recipe? (from Keep Calm and Soldier On)
It’s in the yellow pages under, Restaurant Reservations…sorry I don’t cook well.

4. What would you want your last five words to be when you leave this life? (from My Goal is Simple)
It’s been a wonderful ride.
5. Where do you hope to retire? (from Pennies from Heaven)

We are thinking of joining the State Department and travel the world some more. Honestly we can’t think of one place we would want to be forever.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010



My son and freshman at ASU White washing A

Something New...A Vent

OK, so even though I have been blogging my pity party the last few months I have been keeping up with everyone else's blogs as well. So I have come across a few blogs in reference to MyCAA that have well, kind of pissed me off. Firstly let me explain, I was not happy when MyCAA was abruptly canceled as evident in some of my blog post about it. I was also equally unhappy with the restrictions that were put out when they re-introduced it. What is really bothering me is how this has now turned into a bitch fest about how unfair it is that some wives are entitled and some are not. I think that is wrong, I think it should be open to all spouses on a as needed basis. But what is really disturbing is how some wives are turning on those who qualify (it's not their fault) and also making them feel inferior for only pursuing a certificate or an Associates. I think it is mean spirited and from what I have been reading making these spouses feel a bit like crap. It doesn't make sense that they won't let you use the funds to get a BA/BS of course, it doesn't make sense that all wives can't apply on an as needed basis, kind of like financial aid. What does make sense is that someone with a BA/BS already maybe should understand that funding is limited so maybe this program should be open to those with no degree or certificate. If you have already been fortunate enough to have finished your degree lets give some of the other spouses a chance. If you are making a lot of money in your current career, maybe we should let those spouses not so fortunate get a chance to do the same. What I really don't like is the sense of "entitlement". Of course it would be nice that DOD recognizes the sacrifices we make as spouses and how it impacts our careers. But let's be real, we chose this life for ourselves and that is part of the package. It has always been that way and it will always be that way, the mission is first and our military members must go where they are needed. I don't like how I am reading that we are "owed" anything and that the military should put family first, they can't. I have been around for 16 years, and let me tell you they are trying to make our lives easier, but mission is important. Maybe that is why younger troops are discouraged from marrying, maybe that is why so many young marriages end in divorce, I am not sure. This life is not for the weak. I am just getting so over hearing about how the wives are being screwed over by the military. This life is a sacrifice, our sacrifice is small compared to those of our spouses. I know this may anger some of my readers and for that I am sorry but really it's the hard truth. MyCAA intent was good, they screwed up, they bit of more than they can chew. But for the wife that may want to get a certificate or an Associates I say go for it! It's a start. If your goal is to get a BA/BS than use the money to get you AA/AS first and than move forward. I think what needs to be changed is the rank restrictions, but that is something we should fight as a whole and not attack those that fall into the current guidelines. Support one another, don't attack. We get enough of that from the civilian world we don't need to do it to one another.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Trying to Get Back to Me

Well my blog seems to have turned into a great big pity party for myself. That was never my intention when I started my blog. I started it to connect with people who may or may not be going through the things I am but to also find support. I must say I do get a lot of great support in my comments and I am so grateful. It is nice to know how others are feeling about something I am going through and just to hear from anyone who cares to comment. So here I find myself in the infant stages of emptynest, day one, hour 15...I know I will get through it and I know we will all be fine, what I don't want to do is wallow in misery and pity. So the question is how do I get back to me? Don't get me wrong, I have my own identity, and I know I am strong and can stand on my own. I have a wonderful husband who I love and who I also happen to like and I feel so fortunate to have him in my life. Not to mention he is dealing with his own emptynest, and in a different way. When he deploys it gives him great comfort that our son was home with me, being the man of the house, taking care of his mom. Now when he deploys next year not only will he go missing us, he will go with the worry of me being alone. Today he had to go to the field, I seen he was apprehensive about going, and I told him to go, I will be fine. That wasn't a lie, I am and of course I miss him but missing him and missing my son are on separate plains if you know what I mean.
OK I am rambling, back to the question at hand, do I go from being a hands on mom for the last 18 years, to a hands off mom of a college freshman? Obviously I need to get back to me, get back to things that I can dedicate time to that I couldn't because I was being taxi mom, JROTC mom, all around there for you any time of the day mom. I worked my sons whole life. I was laid off the end of his Jr year and it was a blessing since my hubs was getting ready to deploy and I took it as an opportunity to spend some time with my son before he left home for college. I admit, I let myself go a bit. I haven't worked out as hard as I used to, I gained weight, I just plain made it all about him. I need to get back to me, I need to shift all those energy's. That's how I am going to get through this. I wouldn't change one thing about the last 2 years, well one thing maybe but that's a whole different blog post but the last 2 years giving my son my complete attention was wonderful. I am not going through this alone, it's the three of us and like always we will see each other through it. I decided I am not going to blog about this subject for awhile, not because I don't want to share but because I need to find things to blog about that aren't a "poor me" feel sorry for me subject matter. My son is doing what he should be, we are proud of him and he is going to have the time of my life and that is something to celebrate, not wallow in. I am turning this page, and even though I can not promise I won't shed a tear every now and then I am going to turn this ship around and sail it towards a more positive attitude.
Thank you to everyone who has been with me through this, and will continue to support me. Life is good, and I am a lucky woman.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

He Is An Official Sun Devil

We just left our son in his dorm suite. As you can see it is really nice. His suite mates are great kids as far as I can tell and I met one of the boys moms and she was super nice.  I am doing OK but I will see him tomorrow so my lack of crying my eyes out at this moment is delayed.  So I will see how it goes tomorrow.  He seemed really excited so that really helped. OK I am exhausted. Its been a looong day.

5 a.m.

Well we are here, the morning we take our boy to the dorm where he will spend the next year as a freshmen in college and a midshipmen in ROTC. All that sounds so amazing and I am so proud I could burst. Yet, here I am at 5 a.m. watching him sleeping, like a baby, still looking so young, to young to let go into the world without me. I know he's ready, I know he will be fine, but yet these are the thoughts that rule my mind this morning. Did I prepare him enough, did his dad give him all the "talks"?? Did we miss anything? Will he be ok? Will we be ok? Will we, the "three musketeers" be ok minus one? 4 hours away, seems like a thousand miles apart right now. I just want to freeze this moment because I know after today things will never be like they were before. I love this kid so much, this is harder than I anticipated and I anticipated hard. I think today after I meet the kids he will be spending the next year with and seeing where he will be living it may ease my pain a bit, knowing he will be happy makes it easier too. Another beginning not an ending, a continuation of this life and everything that is "supposed" to be happening. Life is about moving forward, and this will be tough, but I have to be tougher.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Taking Son to College

Ok, so today is the day we drive up to Tempe to take our only child off to college. It is going to be a really emotional weekend and it will be tough but I will just have to be tougher. Before we go I want to show you something my son showed me yesterday from one of his favorite comic strips, Terminal Lance. I am not sure if the kid who creates these strips loves or hates the Marine Corps but I would like to think he does and honestly his strips are hilarious. I was not offended by this comic strip because this is not a "stereotype" I identify with but I must admit I have known a few "mil-spouses" that do, but this depiction is more the exception and not the rule.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Friday Fill In #8

1.What is ONE thing you’d like civilians to understand about being a military family? I would just like them to ask me some questions so I could tell them. I hate when people assume things about our life, or compare their husbands business trip to my husbands deployment. Or our "free" medical care, I like to tell them we have no free medical care, our medical is paid for with blood and sweat and is the most costly on the planet.
2.What is your favorite mistake? Well I have a few, but I could never call them mistakes because they are the greatest loves of my life but came to me unplanned ....
3.What indulgence could you give up for a year? Shoes, purses
4.If you could be a winged animal, what would you be? Penguin because they mate for life and the male penguin is kind of awesome..
5.What is one question you’d like to see asked in a future MFF? What do you think of woman that wear their husbands rank and can you tell a story of if and when you encountered it?

Thursday, August 12, 2010


Newly pinned W.O.  I am so proud of my sisters oldest boy .  He's a great soldier and human being.

Friday, August 6, 2010

Friday Fill In #7

1.What is something you wished you’d learned to do earlier in life? To get my education. I really don't have huge regrets though because every step I made led me to where I am in life at this very moment.
2.What is your biggest pet peeve with the military?I would have to say when you owe them money they can check you next paycheck but when they owe you money it takes FOREVER.
3. What tourist attraction near you have you never seen? A lot of them since we just got here a month ago.
4.What are you avoiding doing right now? Not a thing, I am just relaxing with the hubs and son.
5. Wine, beer or liquor?
Liquor for sure, loved wine when I lived in Spain because I could get the best wine at the best price. Now if I am going to drink it is usually something + vodka..

Monday, August 2, 2010


OK so things around here are getting back to semi-normal. I say that because I managed to unpack all the boxes that were blocking our upstairs hallway and it looks "normal" I say semi because it is a bit misleading considering we have A LOT of boxes hiding in the garage. But that's OK, I can't see them so it allows me to be in denial a bit longer. I have all the stuff I need, until I need something and I realize it must be buried in the plethora of boxes in the garage..UGH.
This weekend my husband finally went out and purchased himself a new truck, I am so happy he finally did because honestly, the guy never does anything strictly for himself and this is something he has been talking about doing for a long time and he wanted a nice truck, you know all the bells and whistles and well he got one! I kind of had to strong arm him into getting it but its done.
On another note, our son is leaving for college in 2 weeks and I haven't really had a second to sit with this and let it sink in, I think if I do I might break down and I really want to keep it together for him, it will break his heart if he sees me sad and thinks he is the cause of it. We spent some time last week together at Universal Studios and we had the best day, it was worth more to me than diamonds and gold or anything in the world, just a day with him to myself. His dad spent the day with him yesterday, they went out and played with their guns at the range..not my kind of fun but I know they had a blast.
I really just wanted to check in and let you all know a little about what has been going on. Your blogs have been great as usual, I try to keep up a few times a week to see what is going on with everyone, I know everyone is busy with getting kids ready to go back to school and doing their own PCS'ing. Ah..gotta love the summer.

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Milspouse Friday Fill in #6

I feel bad I haven't given credit to Wife Of A Sailor for the Milspouse Friday Fill in..I just thought everyone was doing it and took it for granted everyone knew...let me correct that and say thank you to her for starting this for us all.

1. What is your spouse’s best feature?
That he cares about those around him, that he honestly wants us to be happy and do what makes us feel our best. He is incredibly supportive and understanding and I am not the easiest person to get along with at times. I love that he is close to his family and cares so deeply for us all.
2. Mild, Medium or Hot sauce?
Hot, even though it is painful I do love the hot.
3. What is the worst uniform you had to wear for a job?
I worked at Hardees, enough said.
4. You have invisible powers… where is the first place you would go?
I am not sure but great question.
5. What’s left on your “to do” list for this summer?
To make the most of the last 2 weeks with our son before he heads off to college. I know that leaving him at that college may be the single hardest thing I have ever done in my life so far. Yesterday he said it will be ok because he will be home on the weekends and it broke my heart a bit. Didn’t he realize 5 hours away is not coming home every weekend?? I think I may be taking some trips up to see him on the weekends.