THe Harting Family

THe Harting Family

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

How About a Little Perspective

OK, yesterday there was a very HEATED comment thread on a blog called "Semper Spouse". A blog I happen to like and appreciated the ladies for taking their time and talent to get together a group of people going through similar experiences. One of the bloggers on the site, in frustration posted a blog about OPSEC. In all honesty lets not pretend that all of us at one time or another haven't felt the same frustrations. She chose to blog about them, she never once in my opinion actually violated OPSEC. I went back to re-read the post and the post was full of some of the meanest comments I have read on a fellow milspouse blog. I think it was out of line, of course that is my opinion, she didn't divulge anyone husbands locations, names, or anything to warrant such hateful comments. What could have happened and what should have happened is we as fellow bloggers could have talked her down, reminded her the importance of OPSEC and emphasize with her about what she was feeling. Why are some woman so damn mean to other woman? This isn't a milspouse problem, this is a woman problem. Since everyone that was bashing her practices such great OPSEC there was no way she could have put your husband in danger nor do I think she would have anyhow. Lets be honest here, this isn't WW 1 or 2. Our troops are not all over the European Continent closing in on the Nazis, everyone knows where our troops are, turn on CNN, Fox, log on the Militarys own websites, read any base paper sitting outside any gas station or Walmart and you will get more information than you would think possible. Yes, loss lips sinks ships, and we should strongly practice OPSEC and PERSEC. If you chose not to share your base, your hubs name that is your personal right but it certaintly isn't breaking OPSEC. If you divuldge specific movement dates, areas of operations and things specific in nature you are violating OPSEC. I have been doing this awhile, I have been to many OPSEC briefs, I understand the importance. As I was reading the comments on the Semper Spouses blog all I could do is shake my head and feel a huge dissapointment for some of my fellow milspouse bloggers. Some of them with blogs I LOVE, some I know can be supportive and most that have ranted a few times themselves. Semper Spouse blogs is down now, I really hope it wasn't because of the mess that happened yesterday. Please remember, you can use the comment box to educate and impart wisdom. You don't have to attack someone that obviously was feeling a bit rattled and frustrated. We get enough bullshit from the civilian community about our lives, about what our husbands do lets try to be more tolerant with one another. That is my 2 cents on the matter.

13 comments:

Amy said...

I agree. It sucks to know that a community that we love can be so mean and hateful. Makes me ashamed to be a part of the milspouse blog community sometimes. I have often thought about shutting down my blog just because others can't play nice.

USMCWIFE said...

I get that, but don't you dare stop blogging, we need your voice out there. I was just sick about what happened yesterday.

Anonymous said...

Based on the apology posted, I believe the site was shut down due to the post. I think what turned my stomach, and so many others, was her blatant disrespect for the lives of our men and women serving. Ture, it is not WW1 or WW2, but as the daughter of a war victim, you should be able to "empathize" with the women who felt the way they do.

It got very out of hand, very quickly, and it is sad to see a support system gone as a result.

Renee said...

100% Agree!

Megan said...

Well said. Many of the comments were hurtful and I had a hard time reading through them. I completely agree with what you said about this issue.

Amy said...

I do agree with the comment Elizabeth posted about the blatant disrespect that the poster had concerning OPSEC however, it is nowhere near the disrespect that other bloggers had towards the poster. Almost all of the ones that I read lacked the maturity that was needed to handle a post like that. The people who left comments could have handled themselves properly and respectfully and instead chose to take the immature route which is sad. Too bad their aren't etiquette classes on how to handle this type of situation.

USMCWIFE said...

Elizabeth, I get the reason why people were upset, I don't agree with the way they expressed it. I don't believe she was disrespecting us or our husbands, I think (in my opinion) she was feeling frustated and vented. I think it was our duty as fellow milspouses to come at her in a positive way and help her understand why we were upset. How many blogs have I read about how the "Army sucks" or the "Marines Suck" is that disrespectful to the service? No it is someone venting. Yes, my father was killed in Vietnam, I worry about my nephews, my hubs and all my friends in theater at any given time. I didn't feel like she would be a threat to any of them. She needed support. I hope they start the site again.

Unknown said...

I'm glad you posted this blog. I don't follow semper spouse, so I missed her post. But I did see a lot of response blogs. Some were pretty aweful! I hope she starts her site again. And thanks for spelling out what we actually can and can't do. I was worried for a little while. ^_^

USMCWIFE said...

Thanks, I don't want to tell people that they aren't entitled to their anger, but what I would like to see happen is a more positive way to approach something you disagree with you know..this isn't an us against them thing, it should be all for one and one for all.

LCpl'sPrincess said...

I agree so much! Women are so competitive with each other, they under cut one another, and gossip gossip gossip. Its so sad. Its why I take extreme care in who I am friends with. I HATE DRAMA!

Aracely said...

I agree with your post. I've posted frustrations before concerning deployments but I don't violate OPSEC. I missed the post but I think that people should have restrained how they wrote things and thought before in thinking how it would sound to the poster. It is uncalled for to basically bash another poster who is a military spouse just because she vents her frustration with certain things, even if it is OPSEC. If she is not violating OPSEC in her post, than there is no reason to start bashing her on that one thing.

USMCWIFE said...

That was my feeling, she was venting. We all do it about one thing or another. I think more than anything she needed someone to talk her down, not tear her down. I wish I knew who she was so I could talk to her but I don't so I hope she drops by my blog.

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