This is my story of how I have done at letting go of some things. I started this blog when my son was in High School , during a deployment and facing big life changes. I have come out the other side of those changes. Emptynest, long since empty. Our son is now a Lt in the USMC and now we are facing exiting the Marine Corps possibly in the next few years. One thing I have learned is life is constantly in flux, so this is my life...in flux.
THe Harting Family
Monday, January 31, 2011
The Boredom is Something New...
Hi Everyone!! Hope you are having a great Monday. Well I think my title says how I am feeling lately. My hubs is in the field for a month and I think I just may die from boredom. Yep, boredom. You would think since I am an emptynester I would be running around and taking in all the sites California has to offer...well I am not. I am sooooo........bored. It was easier to be home when my son was home. I only did it for a little over a year, last year during my hubs last deployment was the last time I was ever not working. Now that my son in in college I find myself so completely, mind numbingly bored. I did go to a taping of a talk show last week, and had a lot of fun...thanks Sarah L..for trying to end your boredom as well. I do the normal things. I walk, I clean, I exercise (I hurt my knee and I am currently in PT)and I try to get together with my sisters in Arms but still the void is there. I was never a "needy" person. Always incredibly independent...and I think that could be the problem. I am not doing enough to tire my brain. I am not sleeping and I can't stand to even look at the idiot box (tv) one more minute. So I guess this is the meat and potatoes of the emptynest syndrome. Most people get to struggle through this part of life together, figure out the new normal..with support. Well this life doesn't quite work out the normal way....and really this is something I need to fix for me. Right? I do have my Family Readiness Advisor duties and once our deployment kicks off it will get more time intensive and my son will be home for the summer. But I need to find a way to get right with this for times just like this. It isn't going to change, so I guess I have too. Ugh..no one ever said life was easy!
Friday, January 28, 2011
Military Spouse Weekly Round Up
Please head on over to
Like Sunshine After the Rain for this weeks round-up. Her blog looks really nice. I love finding new blogs and you can find some too so hurry up and check out the blog round-up
Milspouse Friday Fill In #28
1. If you were a famous movie star, what types of movies would you star in?Foreign Films, filmed at exotic foreign locations.
2. What is a vacation you would like to take if money were no object?Well thanks to my BFF I am going to Slovenia, Croatia and Venice and Budapest this September. Yep, she purchased a ticket for me to come visit her in Slovenia and we are going to travel for a few weeks. She is my sister (un-biological)and she knew I was going to need a distraction during deployment.
3. Did you have pets growing up? We had 2 Chihuahuas growing up, Bambi and Peanut and apparently I didn't like them very much.
4. What do you do for exercise?I run/walk when my knee is working, do kettle bell workouts and go to aerobics at the base gym.
5. What is the best piece of advice you've ever received as a MilSpouse?Semper Gumby
2. What is a vacation you would like to take if money were no object?Well thanks to my BFF I am going to Slovenia, Croatia and Venice and Budapest this September. Yep, she purchased a ticket for me to come visit her in Slovenia and we are going to travel for a few weeks. She is my sister (un-biological)and she knew I was going to need a distraction during deployment.
3. Did you have pets growing up? We had 2 Chihuahuas growing up, Bambi and Peanut and apparently I didn't like them very much.
4. What do you do for exercise?I run/walk when my knee is working, do kettle bell workouts and go to aerobics at the base gym.
5. What is the best piece of advice you've ever received as a MilSpouse?Semper Gumby
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
I am Trying Here
Ok so I have been experimenting with my blog...I have lost some info on my blog in doing so such as my fave blogs so just bear with me as I work all this out..
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Experience Doesn't Matter When it comes to The Suck
Well...here we are, my hubs and I once again apart. This is the big suck, the one right before the major suck. Ok, guess I need to clarify for those of you not familiar with my personal military lingo. Suck for me is any time the hubs and I are apart for military training of ANY type. There are small sucks, meaning a week in the field for some little training, or maybe a 15k hike or a 30k hike that can take maybe 2 days. Those are not too bad but none the less defined as "The
Suck". Then we have what I call the "Big Suck". These are field ops taking anywhere from 3-6 weeks and are usually closer in nature to what we will refer to now as "The Major Suck" and that my friends is a combat deployment.
So I have been doing this awhile, small sucks, big sucks and major sucks. You'd really think by now I would be used to them or better yet more accepting when they start...that is not true. Of course I can only speak on my own experiences. I have yet to figure out how not to really hate it when dealing with the sucks. One of my friends who's husband is currently in the big suck with me said it was because we are living so close to where the big suck is going down. I don't agree. I think I felt pretty much the same when I was on the other coast of the big suck. Maybe there is a small piece of that logic that I agree with, knowing possibly as the helicopters fly over head my hubs is on one being transported to some small "Faux Fob" maybe 4 miles from where I sit..but again..not sure.
So ladies, how do you deal with the 3 sucks? Don't get me wrong, I am accepting of each one and go about my life with some minor melt downs along the way but could I be the only one that possibly feels that the more suck we deal with does not equate to easier? How many of you are encountering you first major suck soon? Anyway would love to hear from you on this....signing off from the big suck...
Suck". Then we have what I call the "Big Suck". These are field ops taking anywhere from 3-6 weeks and are usually closer in nature to what we will refer to now as "The Major Suck" and that my friends is a combat deployment.
So I have been doing this awhile, small sucks, big sucks and major sucks. You'd really think by now I would be used to them or better yet more accepting when they start...that is not true. Of course I can only speak on my own experiences. I have yet to figure out how not to really hate it when dealing with the sucks. One of my friends who's husband is currently in the big suck with me said it was because we are living so close to where the big suck is going down. I don't agree. I think I felt pretty much the same when I was on the other coast of the big suck. Maybe there is a small piece of that logic that I agree with, knowing possibly as the helicopters fly over head my hubs is on one being transported to some small "Faux Fob" maybe 4 miles from where I sit..but again..not sure.
So ladies, how do you deal with the 3 sucks? Don't get me wrong, I am accepting of each one and go about my life with some minor melt downs along the way but could I be the only one that possibly feels that the more suck we deal with does not equate to easier? How many of you are encountering you first major suck soon? Anyway would love to hear from you on this....signing off from the big suck...
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Milspouse Friday Fill In #27
1.What do you usually want to know about someone when meeting them for the first time? I really don't want or need to know too much. I just need to know if they are friendly and trust worthy. I have a pretty good instinct about people, I try to follow that. I have a very small group of trusted friends and I don't get to add to that group too much. My hubs is a 1stSgt now so I am always weary of some peoples intentions when I meet them. But I will usually try to "guess" where they are from that is always fun.
2.Would you rather know everything about your spouse, or be regularly surprised? I
have been with my hubs over 17 years now. I don't think it's possible to ever know everything about a person, it is like peeling an onion. I don't even know everything about myself and I continue to learn something new every day. What I do know are the important things. He is loyal, faithful, smart and a fantastic father, husband and patriot. He is also one of the smartest people I have ever met.
3.If you could live in one city for the rest of your life, where would you live? I am from Philadelphia but I think I could live in any city. I am a city girl. I love DC, I love NY but home is Philly.
4.When you go out of town, what one material thing do you ALWAYS take? My toothbrush
5.Using no more than 10 nouns, and ONLY nouns, describe yourself. Mother, wife, friend, professional, dieter, sister, daughter.
2.Would you rather know everything about your spouse, or be regularly surprised? I
have been with my hubs over 17 years now. I don't think it's possible to ever know everything about a person, it is like peeling an onion. I don't even know everything about myself and I continue to learn something new every day. What I do know are the important things. He is loyal, faithful, smart and a fantastic father, husband and patriot. He is also one of the smartest people I have ever met.
3.If you could live in one city for the rest of your life, where would you live? I am from Philadelphia but I think I could live in any city. I am a city girl. I love DC, I love NY but home is Philly.
4.When you go out of town, what one material thing do you ALWAYS take? My toothbrush
5.Using no more than 10 nouns, and ONLY nouns, describe yourself. Mother, wife, friend, professional, dieter, sister, daughter.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Facebook Stalking
Do you stalk your kids on facebook? Maybe stalking is too harsh a word, maybe facebook.....checking up? I am a
Friend of my sons on facebook, I get that it is a privilege not to be abused. By that I mean, no facebook scolding like this (left by a good friend of mine on her college age daughters facebook), her daughters status, "1130 at. Night, bored who wants to meet up for some party?". Mom comments " you have class tomorrow and how about hitting the books,". See how that could be a problem? So I take it as a privilege that my son has made me a friend but I often find myself text messaging him about things he says lol. But once in awhile I have the privilege of looking at his facebook and seeing a status update that just amazes me, and this morning was one of those....
Michael H
I grew up on the beaches of Okinawa
In the cities of Europe
and under the Africa Sun
But I matured in the embrace of the Statue of Liberty.
See what I mean....
Friend of my sons on facebook, I get that it is a privilege not to be abused. By that I mean, no facebook scolding like this (left by a good friend of mine on her college age daughters facebook), her daughters status, "1130 at. Night, bored who wants to meet up for some party?". Mom comments " you have class tomorrow and how about hitting the books,". See how that could be a problem? So I take it as a privilege that my son has made me a friend but I often find myself text messaging him about things he says lol. But once in awhile I have the privilege of looking at his facebook and seeing a status update that just amazes me, and this morning was one of those....
Michael H
I grew up on the beaches of Okinawa
In the cities of Europe
and under the Africa Sun
But I matured in the embrace of the Statue of Liberty.
See what I mean....
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Last Two Days.....before he leaves
So hello there blogosphere. Just caught up with my fave blogs...keep it up everyone. I am sorry if I don't comment on them all just know I am lurking and reading them all. I love the blogs I follow and if anyone has any suggestions to some great blogs please comment and I will check them out.
Well today is Thursday and I am enjoying the last few days with our son home. It has been so awesome having him home with us and it's been a great visit. My hubs and son have been doing some pre-deployment bonding..sky diving, snowboarding and martial arts. I have been enjoying waking up in the night and knowing my kid is safe in his bed under our roof, it is the simple things like that you miss. He is anxious to get back to school, and I have to say I am glad he misses his friends and is happy at college. I look forward to spring break....kinda.
Spring break this year, thankfully coincided with block leave..yes the dreaded block leave. My Marine sisters will know what I am referring too. My other military friends if you don't know it is the leave given to Marines before.....deployment!
So next week hubs leaves for the field for a month and my son will be back to school and it will be just me AGAIN..ugh. Oh well, I will get through it I am sure. Hope you are enjoying your New Year.
Well today is Thursday and I am enjoying the last few days with our son home. It has been so awesome having him home with us and it's been a great visit. My hubs and son have been doing some pre-deployment bonding..sky diving, snowboarding and martial arts. I have been enjoying waking up in the night and knowing my kid is safe in his bed under our roof, it is the simple things like that you miss. He is anxious to get back to school, and I have to say I am glad he misses his friends and is happy at college. I look forward to spring break....kinda.
Spring break this year, thankfully coincided with block leave..yes the dreaded block leave. My Marine sisters will know what I am referring too. My other military friends if you don't know it is the leave given to Marines before.....deployment!
So next week hubs leaves for the field for a month and my son will be back to school and it will be just me AGAIN..ugh. Oh well, I will get through it I am sure. Hope you are enjoying your New Year.
Friday, January 7, 2011
Pride
Dear Michael H.
It is a pleasure to inform you that you have made the Dean’s List of the College of
Liberal Arts and Sciences for Fall Semester 2010. We are exceptionally proud of each
student who achieves this academic distinction and of the hard work and dedication to
study that it reflects. In recognition of your accomplishment, I have enclosed a Dean’s
List certificate suitable for framing.
Congratulations on this outstanding achievement. My best wishes for your continued
success in your academic career.
Sincerely,
Quentin D. Wheeler, Ph.D.
Vice President and Dean
Enclosure
It is a pleasure to inform you that you have made the Dean’s List of the College of
Liberal Arts and Sciences for Fall Semester 2010. We are exceptionally proud of each
student who achieves this academic distinction and of the hard work and dedication to
study that it reflects. In recognition of your accomplishment, I have enclosed a Dean’s
List certificate suitable for framing.
Congratulations on this outstanding achievement. My best wishes for your continued
success in your academic career.
Sincerely,
Quentin D. Wheeler, Ph.D.
Vice President and Dean
Enclosure
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Happy or Fast 2011 ( prefer the fast!)
I hope you all had a great Christmas, from reading your blogs the last few days I think for the most part you all did. We had a wonderful Christmas with our son home. We still have him for another week and we are loving it! He has grown much in the last 5 months and loves college and I am actually happy he misses school a little bit and his friends. We were mostly home but we did go to Arizona for a few days and the hubs and Michael went Skydiving..pics and video to come when I get them. This Sunday we are going snowboarding. Deployment is looming and like most military families we are trying to jam a much fun as we can while we are all together. Oh deployment how I loathe you, and I refuse to give you a second thought more then I am required too.
So I just want to share a few pics I shot, I have so much to learn about my new camera....but I am going to learn over the next few months.
This is one of my fave ornaments, my son bought it for my hubs one year when he was in Iraq at Christmas. We have a tradition every year where we buy an ornament that represents our year. My son had to do it for his pops.
This is my niece Stella...she is so pretty and well why wouldn't I want to take a pic of her!
My handsome son with his sly grin...tee hee hee...love his sweet face !
This photo should have been a tell...look at our son..he was so mad when had to take that kevlar off and he would have slept in it if we would have let him! I put this pic in his year book , his dad took it so I can't take credit.
Oh ya and by the way, in regards to the midwest Tornado...special shout out to my friend and fellow blogger...Armygirlnay. Her street was hit and although her home was spared some of her neighbors on FLW were not so lucky. She did her best to spread the news for information and well..that is how she rolls..so happy she was ok and her family as well.
So I just want to share a few pics I shot, I have so much to learn about my new camera....but I am going to learn over the next few months.
This is one of my fave ornaments, my son bought it for my hubs one year when he was in Iraq at Christmas. We have a tradition every year where we buy an ornament that represents our year. My son had to do it for his pops.
This is my niece Stella...she is so pretty and well why wouldn't I want to take a pic of her!
My handsome son with his sly grin...tee hee hee...love his sweet face !
This photo should have been a tell...look at our son..he was so mad when had to take that kevlar off and he would have slept in it if we would have let him! I put this pic in his year book , his dad took it so I can't take credit.
Oh ya and by the way, in regards to the midwest Tornado...special shout out to my friend and fellow blogger...Armygirlnay. Her street was hit and although her home was spared some of her neighbors on FLW were not so lucky. She did her best to spread the news for information and well..that is how she rolls..so happy she was ok and her family as well.
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